My Lethal Weapons of Mass Destruction!
Fear me! For I am a threat to mankind. I have a lethal weapon to instill fear and trembling into the most stout of heart!
I haven’t always been aware that I was such a threat. I have always considered myself a relatively harmless, caring, sharing sort of person who has respect for all life, regardless of breed or size. However, I am deluded. It seems I am a menace to society, something to be treated as an out cast. Why?
I KEEP BOTTLED WATER IN MY BAG!!!!
This situation occurred long before it was forbidden to take any kind of fluids onto planes and under the circumstances and considering the reasons I’d be only too happen to relinquish my bottled water. However, let me take you back a few months before news of sabotage on English aero planes was even an issue.
I was just about to go into the movies carrying my bottle of water, when the ticket boy looked at me very nervously. Backing away slowly to a safe distance he stammered “I’m sorry Madam, you’re not allowed to take that bottle of water into the cinema with you.”
I‘ve always disliked being called Madam at the best of times, makes me feel I run a house of ill–repute. So in my most intellectually challenged voice I said,
“Eh???”
He repeated the statement.
“Why?” I asked incredulously. It’s got the top on, I’m usually pretty good when it comes to consuming food and drink, I promise I won’t spill it on the seats or spit it at people.”
“It’s not that Madam”
“Then what is it?”
“You might throw it at someone and cause them injury.”
It was at this point it was all I could do to stop injuring myself splitting my sides with laughter. I’ve watched some pretty weak and badly produced movies in my time, but never been so upset about it that I’ve felt moved to throw something at someone. Or maybe it was the threat I might take to a life of crime robbing poor innocent children of their candy. I could just picture it, me in a ski mask confronting a young child with ice-cream encrusted chin and those wide ‘deer caught in the headlights’ eyes and demanding, ‘Gimme your choc top -NOW – I have a bottle of water in my pocket and I’m not afraid to use it!”
Why is it, that when a minority do something wrong, illegal or improper – it’s the majority that get tarnished with the same brush and have to comply with the broad stroke restrictions as a result? Common sense is no longer common and something as simple and as innocent as a bottle of water can, in the hands of a law abiding citizen, be seen as a lethal weapon. Such a sad indictment on our modern society.